Feeling Ignored? Don't Blame Yourself

September 27, 2021

Ever felt that uncomfortable feeling of insecurity or embarrassment after being left on read by a friend, or cancelled on last minute? I definitely have! It can cause your head to spin with questions of whether you've done anything to upset them or turn them against you.

I'm pretty confident in saying that most of the time when you feel ghosted or let down, it is not your fault. While it's hard not to automatically search for faults within ourselves, it's more realistic to assume that the other person, even though they'd like to call, text or see you again, simply doesn't have the time or capacity to make it work at the moment.

There are so many reasons why you may not be getting that text back;

They don't have the energy.

They haven't had time to text you back.

They're prioritising other things.

They're feeling overwhelmed.

They're dealing with an illness.

They're looking after a family member.

They are taking some time and space to be alone.

They're busy with work.

They don't feel up for talking.

They're going through a difficult time.

One thing I've started doing is asking friends whether now is a particularly bad time and scheduling in time to talk over the next few weeks if it is. However, it isn't just a one way street. It's incredibly helpful for someone who is busy to just drop a simple "Hi, I'm pretty busy right now, I'll reply when I have time" when they can. It's not a bad thing to be busy or need time to yourself, so being open and honest with one another will ultimately benefit you both and prevent any unwanted and uncomfortable feelings in the future.

We posted an instagram post on this topic recently so if you have any thoughts you'd like to share I'd love to read them!

Post by a member of the Feelmo team.

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